I am not ready to talk about yesterday yet, but I do want to start of thinking of how I can start to move on.
Tomorrow I will begin!
This last week everything has ground to a halt. When I say everything, I mean everything!
Our house hasn't been this upside down in a long time. I have got so far behind with housework, washing, ironing even my baking has ground to a halt!
Starting tomorrow I am going to start getting some control back.
This house is going to have a blitz, it is going to be cleaned, polished and hoovered from top to bottom. I need to do this at the end of the day my life and my families lives go on not matter how hard it is.
But I am also aware of how seeing me upset and crying is affecting Joseph.
The twins are too young to completely realise what is going on but they can sense something is not right, but Joseph is nearly 9, he does understand. We had a heartbroken little boy last night but today he seems to be stronger. I need to take a leaf out of his book. Whenever he has seen me cry today, he has rushed over to give me a hug. Normally you need to beg Joseph for a hug. I need to deal with my grief in a way that is not going to cause the children upset or worry.
They are my focus. Them and my rock of a hubby.
I know that my Grandad would be telling me this!
I also have some bread to be baking. Not only for my family but I am excited to take part in the Great Bloggers Bake Off. It is a fantastic idea that has come from bloggers of The Crazy Kitchen and Mummy Mishaps. When I saw it on Twitter I was too late for the cake bake off so I am determined to find the time this weekend to bake some bread. I have already had my baking thinking cap on and have got an idea but obviously so far this week it has not materialised.
Tomorrow will be different! My bread will be baked!
So watch this space :-)
First things first, I need to spend some time with my hubby and live life in the present and look to the future. I know we are being watched over and this gives me strength.
For more info on Great Bloggers Bake Off visit
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